Roger De Vlaeminck's hair plugs and his farts (plus other assorted Paris-Roubaix potpourri)

De Vlaemick. The man, the myth...the spokesman for a hair restoration clinic.





Before we all mock him, let's point out that he's at least one Paris-Roubaix winner who is honest is honest about his hair plugs (I'm looking your way Musseeuw). Others may need such procedure, but are in denial. So if your name rhymes with Dom Boonen, and you'd like to learn more about De Vlaeminck's procedure, click here.


His hair's not thinning. The dolphin ate it.



De Vlaeminck has a lot of explaining to do once his wife sees this picture.

"Why are you crying honey? I didn't do anything wrong. I like showering with fit, young, black men...is that bad? If you say it is...well, you're racist!"

Note that the kid all the way to the right has his left hand on his STI lever, and I think he's up-shifting.




Not much to say about this one, just a cool image. Oh wait, I do have one thing to say. I like how Merckx has a douche bag (not a figurative, but a literal one) that states his victories for that year. Notice how De Vlaeminck is such a badass, that he's literally farting out the names of his own victories for the year. The cloud with the race's names is visible behind him. Man, that dude was so cool that even his farts sounded like they were saying "Pffft-Rouuuubaix-pffft" in a demure, yet powerful whisper of poo.





De Vlaeminck looks like such a badass in this picture. It's like he's saying:

"Keep smiling big boy, you may have a fancy pink jersey on now...but we'll talk in the spring. I mean, please, your farts are barely manly or audible...while mine whisper the names of my victories, and are fluent in four languages...five if you count Flemish."



Look at Eric Vanderaerden's plumage. Is there something about winning Roubaix that makes you either loose your hair (like De Vlaemick, Museeuw and Boonen), or make it look disgusting for the rest of your life (like Vanderaerden)? Do you have to sign a pact with the devil to win, and all the devil wants is your hair? How did his hair get to be this way? Did someone who just ate rusty Ramen noodles throw up on his head? Why does he only have one front tooth and not two? That one front tooth looks pretty strong though...I bet he can cut cable housing with it so quickly and gently that he won't even crush it.




Lastly, am I the only one who finds using Google Streetview for looking at the Paris-Roubaix route to be great fun? Please don't make fun of me for doing this. Try it! Here's the the velodrome.


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One of the cobble sections, not sure what number this one is.


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The end of Arenberg Forest. Sadly, unlike other pave sections, no streetview of this portion.


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If you want to look at even more portions, here's the route so you can follow along.